Me: mother, wife, was in love with a woman once*, am deeply in love with my husband now**, friend, geek, trekkie, gardener, star gazer, dreamer, witch, attracted to more than one gender***, searching, book lover, scifi and fantasy addicted, singer, lover, secret keeper, artist, writer, gamer, crazy person, not missing anything whilst in a relationship with a person of a certain gender, bisexual.
Happy Bi Visibility Day!!
*I was not a lesbian while with her.
**I’m not straight now that I’m with him.
***Yes, that means also more than two.
Spring is in the air…
And after nearly two years of parental leave, I’m back at work. It’s a weird feeling, coming back to the colleagues (who haven’t changed) and tasks (which are still something we need to do REALLY SOON!). Old problems resurface and I find myself struggling to defend myself against the negativity going around in these halls. There has been a change in the top management and hence there is a lot of insecurity and anger going around. It’s so easy to fall back into old ways and routines, especially since these work-related themes are the one thing I can connect with my colleagues about. But the longer I’m back, the more I realize that I’m really through with these feelings. I don’t want them anymore.
Wow. Long time no see!
It’s crazy how time goes by – not slowly as in the song but fast, so fast in fact, I feel like I live in fast-forward these days and months.
A lot happened! We celebrated Yule and Christmas, we went house-searching (without results) and renovated our kitchen (with amazing results). There’s a big blog post coming up with tons of pictures and I promise, you’ll be amazed! 😉 And with that: yes, I really intend to be back.
But for now let me tell you about last Tuesday. A friend and I went to an art course, called “free painting”. The quintessence was to “Just do”. There was a real buffet of paint and lots and lots of different brushes, dough scrapers, dishwashing brushes, scrapers and other things with which you could work. No guidelines, input only when you asked for it and no limits. 90 minutes of just painting and trying and letting go.
Blogging since 2006. Wow. What a time! 8 years!
I think blogging for me started as a natural extension of keeping a diary once my online life really started. Oh, and those first posts! I cringe, reading them, shaking my head… nothing but proof that I’m not the same person as I was back then. So young and full of hurt and sadness. So much has changed since then… Back than, I thought life had not much to give me but disappointments. Slowly, I made my way to trusting myself and now, I found the one thing I thought back then I’d never get: love. My own family.